“WOULD you marry a 14-year-old girl?” a cousin asked me over breakfast last Sunday, to my bewilderment. “Why should I?” I retorted with a frown on my face. I just didn’t get it why he threw me the question. Not until he pointed to me a happy picture of a couple on the cover of The New Sunday Times. There it was, the picture of a 14-year-old girl, looking resplendent in her Malay wedding dress, with her equally charming 23-year-old husband.

“I am just curious to know what made him marry her. Love?” he wondered ou t loud.“It better be,” was my immediate reaction. Yes, if there is one thing that would hold strong a relationship, it should be love, I would like to opine. Without it, you will not have the will to make your marriage work, no? The discourse with my cousin aside, the issue of child marriage, just when it was about to die down, has erupted again with the latest news, involving the 14-year-old girl, which was viewed with concern by Women, Family and Community Development Minister Datuk Seri Shahrizat Abdul Jalil and women-based NGOs.

To recap, in March, the country was rocked by the news of a Kelantanese man who married an 11-year-old. The issue was also one of hot topics of the week, debated in the media as well as the cyber world some four months ago, when the Malacca Islamic Religious Council decided to allow males, aged 18, and females, aged 16, to wed as one of the State government’s efforts to combat social ills, including teenage pregnancy and baby dumping.

The leeway, it was reported, would only be given upon gaining the permission of the Syariah Court as well as families of the teenagers.

Of course, despite the imposing leeway, the move was greeted with outcry and disapproval from women-based NGOs, arguing, among others, that child marriage amounted to paedophilia, and Shahrizat who said it was "morally and socially unacceptable" for underaged teens to marry.

It was also argued that placing the heavy responsibility of parenthood on children can deprive them of a full and harmonious development. In Malaysia, the minimum age under the Islamic Family Laws is 18 for men and 16 for women. However, the law allows those younger to marry but with permission of the Syariah judge under special circumstances.

Two religious scholars, ex-Perlis Mufti Dr Asri Zainal Abidin and PAS ulama head Datuk Harun Taib, however, begged the public to look at the issue positively as they felt that teens, especially those involved in premarital sex, should be allowed to marry early, which is valid in Islam, to prevent more social ills.

It would also give the teens, they said, the realisation they need to be responsible for their acts, to face consequences rather than finding ways to escape by indulging more in premarital sex or, in extreme cases, dumping their babies.

Moreover, such a marriage needed the consent of both families, encouraging family involvement in dealing with the issue.

In all fairness, everyone has a point to make and I personally found each point reasonable, except for the sweeping thought that child marriage amounts to paedophilia. Unless it is a common practice that child marriages take place without the consent of both families, the generalisation is a tad unfair. But without the consent, such marriages won’t materialise in this country.

Now, coming back to the latest case involving the 14-year-old and her 23-year-old husband, I don’t think we should be overly concerned over their marriage. Why should we? After all, the marriage had the Syariah Court’s consent and it would not have been obtained without the permission of their parents.

Everyone knew what they had gotten into. The couple bravely came out in the open and the man could be an exemplary husband. Who knows? They could have easily eloped and married in a neighbouring country like what some of our VIPs did.

Islam is a strong advocate of marriage which, I was told, is one of the top on the list of things a Muslim should hasten apart from burying the dead and treating guests, among others. It’s a divine union which should be greeted with well wishes and encouraging words.

I really don’t care what more the couple, whose union was inadvertently thrown into the limelight, would face in the media in the coming days as I have only encouraging words for them. They looked happy and I am happy for them, too.

Make it work and I hope they won’t be part of the rising statistics of divorce rates in the country, which we should be worrying more about.

Recent statistics, released in September, revealed that for every 9.6 marriage registered, there was one divorce. Last year, in every 6.1, there was one. And, the children suffer the greatest. I know a lot of people indulging in extra-marital affairs. I also know some who have mistresses and toyboys, too.

Shouldn’t we also be more worried with the statistics released by Indonesian NGO Migrant Care? Their records showed that as many as 600 girls and women from Malaysia had eloped with their Indonesian lovers and ended up in Lombok. What about the claim of university students in Sabah resorting to prostitution to pay for their education? And, of course, what about the worrying level of teenage premarital sex and baby-dumping cases in the country? Now, again, would I marry an underaged girl? Being a man, I should come up with a reason, but I don’t have any at all.