Marriage is an image of Christ and His bride, the Church. It is a sanctuary for love, for the bringing up of children, for the care of souls. It is a good and holy vocation blessed by God and protected by the moral teachings and sacramental witness of the Church.
But what if you are in unbearable pain, as I once was, because your married life is a complete disaster?
No one marries in order to be unhappy. We all want to be loved in the purest sense—unconditionally, for who we really are, not for who we should be. Only God can bestow it perfectly, but we desperately long for this love from our spouses. Yet, how many of us really know how to give it, never mind obtain it? Is it even something worth hoping for?
If you are concerned in any way that your marriage is not what it ought to be, I recommend a radical program that will make you look crazy even to yourself, but will produce miracles. It is unspeakably hard and takes courage, so brace yourselves. But also prepare to discover a greater and more enduring happiness, and a life imbued with love and purpose.
This program isn't mine. It's the Church's. I'm no scholar, so I won't attempt to unpack the Catechism or any of the relevant encyclicals, but I highly recommend a wonderful interpretation for the layperson found in a book called, For Better... Forever! A Catholic Guide to Lifelong Marriage, by the Catholic family therapist, Dr. Gregory Popcak. Here's a sample:
Anybody else feel like whooping and throwing your hat in the air? I love this guy! My Christian dignity? Demands it? Talk about counter-cultural! Now none of us can accomplish any of this on our own, it takes reliance on God. We need a prayer life and the sacraments of the Church, at the very least. But after reading this book, I felt galvanized and challenged in a way I never had before.